Dear Princess …. What’s In It For Me?
“Dear Princess of Suburbia, all of my life, I have done things for people, without asking anything in return. Now, the more I reach out to help, the more I feel used, undermined, and devalued. I often end up giving away my last dime as the scriptures commands that we love each other. I am tired of doing and never getting a head way. A friend finally asked me my reason for doing all of these? And she tells me the way to really succeeding without being used is asking what’s in it for me? I am conflicted can you help me out Princess?”
Dear Caitlyn from Cary, North Carolina, my heart really goes out to you. I can certainly say that I know how it feels, when you are a blessing to others and you are constantly struggling to make ends meet.
So let’s tackle your question… Should you start asking what’s in it for me? This is indeed a tough one. Tough in that, the word of God tells us to be generous…it tells us to be our brother’s keeper… it tells us to love unconditionally… it tells us that why tell someone to come back when what they need is right in our hands… However, we also have to use wisdom in all that we do. Though everything in life may seem permissible… that does not mean that you are meant to do it in that season.
Here is a litmus test for you darling Caitlyn, rather than ask what’s in it for me, ask this: Lord are you calling me to get involve in this situation? Is this a situation I am meant to get involved in? What’s in it for me has a derogatory tone to it… it gives the assumption of a selfish, self-centered heart. In the same token,when asked in the right way, it can help you to really cut through unnecessary traffic maneuvering their way in your life…
So you have someone who brought a proposal to you. YOU ARE A WRITER… This season, you know all you are supposed to be doing is working in that capacity and getting yourself grounded. Then someone comes to you and tells you they have a business proposal for you… and the proposal has nothing to do with what you are supposed to be doing… Rather than ask what’s in it for me, you ask, how does this progress my vision and life purpose? What’s in it for me can be turned into a positive connotation… How does this progress my vision. Sadly, many of us are so busy.. involved in so many rings which are taking us away from exactly what we know we should be doing.
My Vision Nugget for Today:
Clean out your closet. Get rid of those things which are not progressing your core vision. Rather than ask what is in it for me, ask this… how is this progressing my vision? How is it going to take me from where I am to where I desire to be. And once you it figure that it is not beneficial to your cause… move away from it and quit wasting time.
If you have some burning questions that you would love for me to tackle, please log on to my website at theprincessofsuburbia.com. Go to my blog tab and click on Dear Princess… Send me an email. I look forward to hearing from you.
Until next time, be inspired, be motivated, be of sentimental value, and be authentic.
Bye for now.
Dr. Princess Fumi Hancock, BSN, MA, Ph.D, DNP.
Your Vision Midwife, Behavioral Health & Transformation
Interventionist turned Award Winning Filmmaker, TV/Radio Host